What does it mean to practice? What does it mean to repeat something again and again to acquire or maintain proficiency in it? When what we are doing seemingly shows no indication of change? What are we really going for anyway? Some of us come to yoga because our doctor said so, or maybe your running coach said, “Do it to stretch.” Maybe your girlfriend/boyfriend/person practices yoga so you joined in.
Whatever the reason, your there. Your on your mat, you make shapes with your body and awareness came. You are happier, you sleep better, your conscious.
Other things start to happen too. You are up close and personal with your shit. You see your negativity and frustration with what is and your fear of change. You are aware of the shame you cultivate comparing yourself to others who are seemingly winning at the yoga thing more than you are. You are awake.
I had a brutal practice the other day that felt like I was pushing boulders up Mount Everest. Slogging through, there was no gratitude, no joy, and no self love. I was in LAST PLACE at the Yoga Olympics and not winning in Teacher of the Year. I was berating myself for being a shitty teacher and bearing witness to my negative self talk and yet I kept going.
You know what you get when you practice? PRACTICE. You get the satisfaction of staying in the slog and not disintegrating. And here is where it gets interesting. you learn how to be in the shit, the difficult and the unwavering suck without quitting.
You get the satisfaction of right living without the pomp and circumstance.
You get your ROCKY moment.